


smile for me

by louistoplinsonxx



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Bisexual Louis Tomlinson, Drugs, F/F, F/M, M/M, Smut, Strangers to Lovers, THEY JUST TALK ABOUT IT, harry had abusive dad, ill add tags later on
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-18 05:41:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29978214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louistoplinsonxx/pseuds/louistoplinsonxx
Summary: Harry transferred to a new university, far away from his parents house. He hasn't seen them in a year but still, he feels better now that he is in Southampton and his dad is still in Holmes Chapel. Second year started alright, he met only Niall Horan but he was a nice friend. Harry hasn't touched alcohol since graduating high school, wasn't planning on it, but what happens when Niall drags him along to one of his friends party.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan/Original Female Character(s), Zayn Malik/Liam Payne
Kudos: 1





	1. first

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! it's my first book, i kind of know what i want to do with it, i'm just not sure if i'll ever finish it :) enjoy :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first book! please leave your opinion!

Harry was standing in what looked like a living room, watching as people drank, smoked and danced. It took him back a few years when he was in high school, doing this almost every fucking day. Bad memories tried to get on his mind so he just took a deep breath and followed Niall, his only friend he made so far. Niall seemed to know people as he ‘bro-hugged’ with a couple guys and led them to the kitchen.

“What do you want to drink?” Niall questioned as he opened the fridge, Harry couldn’t see much but from what he could, there were beers and tequila bottles. More memories were floating around and he just pushed them back as much as he could.

“Um, water would be fine.” 

“Are you kidding?” Niall turned around with a confused grin on his face. Harry didn’t say anything so Niall just shrugged, grabbing a can of beer “Well suit yourself,”. He was glad Niall wasn’t questioning him about why he doesn’t drink so he went to the fridge and found just alcohol so he didn’t grab anything. “I’m going downstairs for a smoke, hopefully Nick’s there.” Niall explained, “Come with me?” 

“Yeah, sure” He followed Niall to the stairs. Thing is, Harry smoked, not cigarettes because that's just a waste of lungs, but he enjoys a good pot, well, enjoyed. He’s not going to dwell on this now, preparing himself he stepped in the basement and to be fucking honest, he have never seen a basement this cool. There were grey walls with graffiti on them and led lights everywhere, table football on the right and two big couches with an armchair on the left. People were sat down on the couches smoking joints and small glass table between them, two girls were sitting on the armchair just laughing at something probably stupid. On the couch facing them, there was a red-haired guy with a guitar on his lap and a taller, older-looking guy with a quiff, on the other couch, Harry couldn’t see much but there was a beanie person and then two guys leaning on each other. Niall went to sit beside the redhead and Harry followed him and sat next to Niall.

“Hello lads, i haven’t seen you in a while. What are you up to?” Niall said in his typical cheerful tone as he mentioned to the whole group, the girls weren’t really paying attention as they were now snogging. Harry’s eyes fell on the guys in front of him, on the left there was a very muscular guy with a clean shaved beard and hair swept upwards. He was leaning on raven haired greek god, Harry is not exaggerating. His eyes were beautiful brown colour and his long, thick eyelashes cast shadows on his cheekbones. Harry also noticed a nose ring as he moved on to look at the last guy in the beanie, Harry’s mouth might’ve slightly parted and/or watered at the sight. Scratch what he said about the last guy, this man was a greek god. His cheekbones could cut and his ocean-ish eyes were prominent even in this dim lightning, he was staring back at Harry, Harry quickly collected himself, connecting his lips back and turning to Niall.

“Not much, just the usual,” black haired guy spoke, his accent thick, as he turned to look at Harry, “who did you bring tonight?” 

“That’s Harry, he transferred here a few weeks ago so i figured why not bring him here you know,” Niall said and Harry smiled “actually i don’t think he’s ever been to a party, always studying his head off” he snickered and Harry just scoffed.

“I’ve been to plenty, don’t worry.”

“Anyways, I’m Liam,” the guy on the left spoke and turned to the guy next to him, “This is Zayn, my boyfriend,” Liam said with the emphasis on the boyfriend part. 

“I’m Louis, that’s Ed and Nick” the guy in front of him said and he had a thick accent too, his mouth moving too quickly, but Harry catched the names as he was paying extra attention to Louis the second he spoke.

“Alright, now when we have that out of our way, can we smoke?” Niall impatiently leaned forward to pick up one of the bags on the table with weed in them. Grabbing a paper and a filter he looked up. “Can anyone roll it please?”

“You’re taking my weed Niall, roll it yourself” Nick scoffed.

“I can roll,” Harry chirped in already putting his hand forward, expecting Niall to give it to him. Few of the guys snickered and Harry scrunched his eyebrows as the Irish one just let out a laugh.

“Yeah, as if you’ve ever done that” Louis said, picked up the things from Niall’s hand and grabbed a small tray, which he put on his knees. What he said was a bit uncalled for, and sure, Harry may look innocent or something, but he’s far from that. He suddenly wished he didn’t come, but he tried to focus more on Louis’ tongue licking the paper and glueing it together. He took a lighter from his pocket in his denim jacket and put the joint to his lips before lighting it and handing it to Niall.

“I have” Harry muttered and averted his gaze to his lap as he played with his rings. Niall just laughed and started asking the other boys some questions. Feeling a bit hot in his long sleeve button-up, it was loose and from a chilling fabric but he still felt unnecessary hot, he pushed up his sleeves and contemplated on putting his hair in a bun but decided against it because he would need to stand up and he wasn’t going to do that.

“Is there something to drink?” Harry asked, not wanting to just get up and look lost. Louis, Zayn and Niall turned to him as the others were talking about something else. 

“There’s beer upstairs and i’m pretty sure you’ll find some vodka here.” Zayn answered and while it was nice that Zayn answered, it didn’t really help Harry, he still wasn’t planning on drinking tonight.

“I don’t drink, but thank you,” All three of them frowned, looking at Harry, “I’m just going to go find some juice or something” He said, uncrossed his legs and was about to get up when Louis spoke.

“That was a joke, right?”

“No, why would i joke about that?” Harry sat down as Louis’ gaze wasn’t leaving him.

“So you’re telling me you went to parties and yet you don’t drink?” Louis questioned with a bit of a smirk “What were you doing the whole time? Just sitting around waiting till you can go home?” That was completely rude and false, Harry used to party a lot, like a lot lot. That’s where all the ugly memories are from, he doesn’t want to think about it, not now anyways. 

“No, I used to drink, I just don’t drink anymore.” Harry reasoned and was about to get up again when Niall pulled him down. He did not like this one bit, felt stuck in here as he just wanted to have a sip of water.

“I would’ve never guessed you were the party type in high school” Harry just shrugged. “If you don’t drink, have a smoke.” Niall handed him the joint and Harry didn’t want to. He just didn’t. 

“No”

“Oh c’mon, i don’t believe you’ve ever been drunk or high,” Louis said, and he noticed Zayn was chatting with Liam. He just sighed, ruffled his hair with his right hand and stood up.

“Not now, i want to get the water”

“I’ll go with you,” Louis spoke and Harry froze because, what? Why would he go with him to get water? “You don’t know it here and you’d probably never come back” He reasoned and stood up. He was quite short, but those tight skinny jeans did justice for his thighs. He bent forward to pick up a lighter and a pack of cigarettes. “Might as well get fresh air,” which is very contra productive because he's going to be inhaling smoke and not the fresh air, but whatever. Smiling, Louis started to walk towards the stairs which let Harry to stare at his ass, a nice ass. 

Niall snickered and elbowed him, “You are quite thirsty, aren’t ya?” Harry just shook his head and went after Louis, catching him before he got to stairs. Now when Harry thinks about it, he is very attractive, but from what he said he is quite rude, or maybe just honest but he definitely isn't a kind person. Harry isn’t even sure if he’s gay, but it’s not like Harry’s interested. He looks like a one night stand kind of guy and Harry’s 100% not that. 

As they went up the stairs, Louis’ arse was right in front of Harry’s face. He didn’t really want to stare but it moved nice. “Are you staring at my ass Harry?” Louis asked without turning back or stopping.

“Yes, I am.” Harry said firmly. Louis laughed and stepped into the main floor where the music blasted and the only thing you could smell was sweat mixed with alcohol. Louis turned around and grabbed Harry’s forearm to get through the mass of people. His delicate fingers were cold against Harry’s arm but he let Louis lead him to the kitchen. 

“How old are you Harold?” Louis asked as he opened one of the bottom cabinets and grabbed two water bottles.

“It's just Harry, I'm 20, Lewis.” Harry shot back and Louis threw one of the bottles and smirked. 

“That's old enough to be drinking. Why don't I make you a drink?” Harry sighed and shook his head, “It's not gonna be anything strong I-”

“No, I don't drink anymore, it's not gonna happen. I'm fine with being the only sober one. Thank you for the water, but I'm not drinking, maybe next time or something.” Harry insisted so Louis just nodded and went through the little door next to the fridge, Harry followed. Clear air hit him as they stepped onto a little patio with just a few people, mostly just talking and smoking. Harry inhaled and looked around, there was a bench with a girl sitting on one side. He wanted to sit, so he figured it wouldn’t matter.

“Where are you going?” Louis hissed and tugged on his arm as Harry got closer to the bench. “Don’t go sit there, stay with me and we can’t get to know each other.”

“We can do that on the bench.” He motioned to the bench where the girl was just getting up while talking to someone on the phone. He heard Louis’ exasperated sigh so he went to sit on the right side of the bench, Louis just slumped next to him and put a cigarette to his mouth, flicking the lighter he lit it and inhaled. “Do you have a problem with this bench?” Louis turned to him and it was dark, but Harry could still see he looked confused.

“What? Ohh. No no, I don't. It’s just..” he trailed off and looked at the girl who was still on her phone by some trees. “She’s my, eh, well, we used to date.” Oh, so he is straight, that’s disappointing. “Don’t look that disappointed, it was quite the time ago, but it’s still a bit awkward, you know.” Louis shrugged, “Talking to somebody like you don’t know them even though they sucked you off and stuff.”

“I disagree with you here, I'm a  _ very _ good friend with my ex, but I just hoped you were into men and not women.” 

“Is that so? Well, i'll let you know i'm plenty into men.” he said it so proudly and with a big grin, Harry felt like he was his mum watching him grow up. That was stupid because they only met like 15 minutes ago and he didn't know shit about him. 

“So a bisexual then? Awesome.” he couldn't help it, the comment came out naturally. Louis laughed, it was very endearing.

“Are you gay?” straight to the point then. He hid his grin while he sucked on a cigarette.

“Oh yeah, very.” He nodded eagerly and the tone of his voice could've been interpreted only as trying-to-be-seductive.  _ Oh god, what is he doing?  _

“Harold, was that supposed to be flirting?” Louis questioned, looking a bit too amused for it to just be friendly banter.

“What?” Harry pretended to not know what exactly Louis was talking about.

“The ‘Oh yeah, very.’”

“No, it wasn’t. I’m better at flirting than that. I was just stating how enthusiastic i am about men.” he covered up pretty easily and Louis laughed again.

“Somehow i doubt the flirting part very much.” Louis was shaking his head a bit and his smile was still present on his lips. It sounded a bit like Louis was challenging him.

“You seem to doubt a lot of things about me Lewis, I’m gonna prove you wrong someday.” Harry was never the one to pass a challenge.

“Why not today?” Louis asked, curios. Maybe wondering if Harry is really that innocent or summat. He never really let loose anymore, but he felt like he should forget the past for today and enjoy this man’s company.

“I can prove the flirting part today, if you want” he shrugged, not sure why the hell did he agree to flirting when the last time he did it was like a year back when he tried to get himself into a relationship just for the sake of it. You know, to not feel so alone.

“I would love to see you flirt, smartypants” Louis was smirking and lighting another cigarette.

“ _ That’s  _ what you’re going to call me? Really?” Harry tried to sound as offended as he could even though he was just amused by how comfortable Louis was getting.

“You don’t drink, you don’t smoke, i haven’t seen you around yet and you have this whole goodie goodie look about you.” Oh, so goodie goodie, Harry just snorted in his head.

“Yeah okay, you’ve got a point. But i am everything but innocent.” He winked. Not sure why, he just did.

“Prove it then. Go get that guys number, if you can I'm gonna take a shot alone, if you can't you need to take a shot with me.” Boy, was Louis confident. Well, he wasn’t the only one. 

“Make it three shots.” 

  
  
  
  


As he was walking towards the small group of people he unbuttoned his shirt almost halfway, touched his curls a bit and straightened his back. Getting someone's number shouldn’t be hard at all, Harry had a tactic in his mind already, and he knew he was good looking so that always helped. He scanned the group, three guys sharing a joint, not sure which one Louis meant, so he picked one by himself. Tall one with light brown hair, gave off bit of a hipster-y vibe, Harry’s kidding, he just looked the most gay from the three. He also had a really cool shirt with hawaiian patterns and bracelets on both of his hands. Objectively speaking he was pretty good looking, maybe even cute, sure as hell had a big dick. _ What?  _ He can’t be thinking about someone’s dick, jesus.

“Hi,” Harry just said when he stood in front of them with a big charming smile. He was looking just at the hipster boy so they would get the hint.

“Hello, to what do we owe the pleasure?” His voice was pretty deep and slow, his eyes scanned Harry’s body and he looked interested, which is very good. His friends just scoffed and moved away, at least they got the hint.

“I'm Harry” he said coyly, knowing well it was the great direction the second the man in front of him smirked.

“Harry, what brings you here? Haven’t seen you around before.” The guy hasn't said his name but he looked intrigued. Harry’s plan was going so well, he mentally high-fived himself.

“Just transferred here actually,” Harry smiled and stepped a bit closer “my friends dared me to kiss you and i figured it could be a great opportunity to get your number, would be nice to know more people here” He winked and got even closer, picked his phone from the back pocket and gave it to the guy. 

“You’re confident, I like you,” the guy smirked and grabbed the phone from Harry’s hands. He probably wasn’t sure what to name himself in the contacts, so it took a while. Harry took one step even closer to look as he was interested in what the guy was typing in. The guy just locked the phone, grinning and gave it back to Harry. Their foreheads were almost touching, so Harry just leaned a bit closer, thank god the guy knew what he was doing and swung a hand around Harry’s waist to bring him closer and kiss him. It was a pleasant kiss, nothing sparked but it was nice. He wrapped both of his hands around the guy's neck and kissed him some more before doing a quick peck and leaning backwards. The guy hungrily went after his movements but Harry put a hand on his chest. 

“I’ll call you,” he said as he detached himself from the guy. Winked and was about to walk off when the guy grabbed his wrist. Harry smirked to himself and turned around in innocence.

“Luke, my name’s Luke,” Luke said and winked too. Harry’s smile got bigger as he walked away. He won, well, he didn’t doubt his flirting skills, but still it feels good to win.

He was walking towards the bench where he noticed Louis just staring at him, maybe in disbelief or maybe in amusement. As he got closer he noticed Louis’ eyes were on his chest, Harry just laughed as he sat down and buttoned his shirt back up till only two of the buttons were undone.

“Looks like you need to take three shots now”

“That was hot”

They said at the same time and Harry just burst into laughter while Louis just sat there.

“Who would’ve thought you’re so talented” Louis shook his head and Harry was still laughing. “But,” Louis raised his finger up to Harry’s face, he stopped laughing after a while and looked at Louis confused, “He wasn’t the one i was talking about” 

“Oh c’mon, you didn’t specify,” Harry threw his hands in the air, that was just unfair, “you know, Lewis. I could do that the whole night, but i didn’t come here to have my phone full of numbers I’m never gonna call.” Harry whined a bit cause he still didn’t want to drink, but to banter with Louis he needed it. 

“You’re not gonna call him?” Louis asked and he looked, well, he looked surprised, which ironically took Harry by a surprise.

“What? Why would I call him? Do I look like a one night stand type of guy to you?” Louis shook his head and Harry tried to hide how offended he was. Nothing wrong with hook-ups; he just didn’t like them.

“No, no. I just- Well you looked interested..” Louis trailed off, while Harry just scoffed.

“Which one were you talking about before?” 

“The one on the right, he is straight as a fucking ruler, i wanted to see if he would get offended or mad.” Louis reasoned and Harry laughed because of course Louis would do that, “Why are you laughing? I thought you were mad?” Louis looked confused, it really was the cutest shit Harry’s ever seen.

“I’m not, just offended” Harry reassured him with a hand on his shoulder, as if Louis would care about Harry being mad at him. “Now tell me, who else here is ‘straight as a fucking ruler’?” Harry was grinning and he was also being very stupid, he was aware of that. But Louis let out an amused chuckle and lit up another cigarette. 

“You're not gonna tell me?” he questioned, but as he thought about it more, it’s probably for the best and they should get back down.

“No, also what did Luke save himself as?” Right, Luke. Harry fished his phone from the back pocket and unlocked it. ‘Daddy’ was there and it sure as hell wasn’t there before, oh god, poor Luke. Harry is never going to call him.

“What?” Louis questioned and grabbed Harry’s phone from his hands and started laughing, like really laughing, clutching his stomach and all that. When he realized Harry wasn’t laughing he stopped, “You’re not going to call him, are you?” Harry just grinned and took his phone back, “Are you kidding? Minutes before you were offended I said you were interested in him and all he had to do was call himself ‘daddy’ and you’re blushing and thinking about calling him?” Louis looked like he was actually hurt and it was funny, he was trying to hold back a laugh so he shook his head.

“I was joking Lewis, not going to call him. Although I must say I think I have a daddy kink, Luke doesn’t look like a ‘daddy’ to me though.” Harry pointed out and stuck his phone back after renaming the contact to Luke.

“So what does ‘daddy’ look like?” Louis asked seriously and Harry turned to him and didn’t hold back a laugh. 

“I’m not telling you, plus you need to take three shots and we should probably get back down.” He got up and Louis just followed him back into the kitchen where he went through the fridge, grabbed a tequila bottle and put it on the island with salt and lime. 

“Body shots?” Harry gasped and Louis smirked, no way, no fucking way. Harry is not doing body shots with Louis. Not with anyone, first of all he is sober, second of all he hasn’t done body shots in years, third of all he is not getting naked.

“No.” Harry said and grabbed some plastic cups to hand it to Louis.

“Suit yourself,” Louis shrugged and it was nice because he wasn't persuading him into anything, no means no. “You said three?” he asked, already pouring the second shot. Harry nodded and when Louis licked his own hand and poured salt on it, Harry could only stare. He was thinking about it too much, is the thing. All the bad stuff has already happened, and sure he didn’t know it here as much but he could take care of himself, he could let loose for once after so long. So he grabbed one of the shots. “You don’t need to drink with me, don’t feel pressured” Louis said while he watched Harry lick his hand and pour salt on it.

“No worries, I've thought about it long enough, tonight is the need for tequila stronger than the want of staying sober. Finally.” he grabbed the sliced lime. “Cheers” he licked the salt, threw the shot in his throat, swallowed and bit into the lime. Oh how he missed this, shit, he hasn’t even realized how good it was. He sighed and smiled.

“You good? I don’t think i’ve ever seen someone take a shot of tequila that quickly and with that much happiness” Louis threw a smile and shook his head. 

“That’s what being sober for over a year does to you, now gimme another” Harry said and went to grab the salt again, but Louis stopped him,

“Sober for a year? Why?” He questioned, but Harry wasn’t going to spill his deepest darkest secrets to someone who he met an hour ago.

“We are not talking about that, but if you’re worried for my health, I’m healthy and my liver is not failing so two shots won’t kill me. C’mon, i’ve already had one, so down yours and then we can have another and go downstairs.” Harry offered and he’s not going to lie, he tried his best charming smile, just so Louis wouldn't protest. It worked.

“Yeah alright, but i’m not letting you have more than two.” Louis said and downed his shot and grimaced, probably doesn’t like tequila much. Harry grabbed the salt and did the same process, after biting the lime he sighed again. 

“Yeah sure” he murmured. The burn should feel foreign after a year and something but really, it was so familiar Harry felt like he was 17 all over again. Which wasn’t particularly a good thing so he decided to not drink any more tequila shots, even though it was tempting as fuck, to just get wasted again.

“Let’s go,” Harry said to Louis after he drank the shot. He wasn’t drunk, to get drunk he would need a lot more. Hell he probably wasn’t even tipsy, but that doesn’t matter, he can’t let his guard down after more than a year. Fuck, why did he even take the first shot? Was it because of Louis? It can’t be, right? Louis is beautiful and maybe even funny, but that wouldn’t make Harry drink again. Oh right, it’s probably because Harry avoided every house party since high school, he probably still isn't strong enough to be in this environment. The tequila shot just looked so delicious, and it was. God, it was so delicious. They should just go back down and Harry should not have any more alcohol. So Louis tuggged at his shirt and lead the way downstairs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i kind of have a vision, but feel free to put your thoughts in the comments :)


	2. Second

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please bear with me :/ i'm trying to figure out where i want to take the story :)

They don’t talk, just sit down at the couch the exact same way as before. Only thing different is that Niall had some girl on his lap, the women on the armchair disappeared, Ed and Nick were singing something. Liam and Zayn were laughing and had hands all over each other.

“Finally Tommo! I was wondering if you’ve already pulled.” Zayn clapped him on his back and everybody laughed.

“Nah, just got a bit carried away with Harold here.” Louis patted Harry’s knee across the table, “He kissed Luke, got his number and took two shots of tequila like it was water. I’m starting to believe he went to more than one party,” Some of them cheered and Niall patted him on the back, while Harry just grinned.

“So let’s do another round of shots then, I think plastic cups should be beside the table and vodka is in the mini fridge.” Zayn offered, and Harry could go for a shot of vodka, it’s not like it will kill him or something.

“I’ll pass, I feel like I'm flying,” Ed said, probably high off his mind and everybody laughed. Harry got up to grab vodka and cups. As he went to the table and the mini fridge a girl approached him.

“Hey cutie. Haven't seen you ‘ere before? Where have you been all this time? I was looking for someone this handsome” She slurred and swung an arm over his neck. He just laughed and grabbed her by the waist. They were side to side. Even if he was straight there’s no way he would fuck someone this drunk. 

“Love, you’re really pretty too, but i’m gay and you’re too drunk” He offered and smiled when she just beamed, “you can stay with me- well us,” he motioned to the couches, “I could look after you, you know, so no-one takes advantage” He sat her down on the empty table and bend down for the cups. 

“That’d be awesome! I’ve always wanted gay best-friend!” She clapped and giggled, she jumped off the table and lost all her balance so Harry just put his arm around her shoulders so she could lean on him. Jesus she is wasted, Harry wondered where her friends are. There was a cough behind them when Harry went to open the fridge.

“What’s taking you so long?” He saw Louis when he turned them around, the girl was still giggling, she reminded him of his old friend from high school, but she was a bit smaller than Emily and (objectively saying) had smaller tits. 

“That your boyfriend?” the girl spoke and swayed her finger in front of Louis’ face. Harry laughed while Louis just looked shocked, but then his lips quirked up to a small smile.

“No, no he’s not. Actually just met him tonight.” Harry smiled and grabbed the vodka bottle. Thanks to his big hands he could easily handle the bottle and cups in one hand. “What’s your name love?” He asked the girl.

“Brooke! but you can call me Boo cuz its cute” she bit her lip trying to stifle her giggle but it didn’t help. Louis was laughing and Harry was just grinning and led her back to the couches, Niall was sat next to Zayn, so Louis went to sit beside Nick and Harry followed. He put Brooke on his lap and let her get comfortable by putting her head on his shoulders and completely leaning on him. Niall was now without the girl and raised his eyebrows at Harry who just snorted and shook his head. 

“Boo do you want to sleep it off?” he whispered to her ear and she giggled again. She’s 18 at most, he feels like a big brother.

“Let’s do the shots!” Niall called and everybody cheered. Harry put the vodka and the cups on the table, but he couldn’t really pour the shots with Brooke on his lap so he just tapped Louis’ knee and said to pour the shots. Louis looked at him for a bit too long before he leaned forward and opened the bottle. After he handled everyone one shot he turned to Harry.

“Is she sleeping?” Harry asked because Brooke hasn't moved in a while. Louis laughed and nodded. “Thank god” Harry whispered, grabbed her bridal style and moved her to the armchair. She was indeed sleeping, Harry made a mental note to grab her to his dorm so she didn’t wake up with a broken back. She looked nice. He sat back next to Louis and sighed. Noticing he only had one shot in his hand he asked, “Where’s my shot?” excited to feel and taste vodka again.

“You’re not drinking,” Louis said and Harry frowned. Why would Louis say that? He’s having fun and he knows ho won’t go to parties regularly. Besides one shot won’t get him drunk. Louis shouldn’t be the one to decide, they don’t even know each other. Harry hasn’t drunk alcohol for a year and three months, give or take a few weeks. So, yes, he is going to have this shot, it’s not like it used to be, he is just having fun.

“I am having this shot” Harry said and grabbed the shot from Louis' hand and threw it down his throat. Oh he did miss vodka even more, vodka was the alcohol he used to buy when he was like 16 in desperate need to get drunk, because it’s cheap and you get drunk quickly. It also tastes disgusting, but he missed it. “Thanks, cheers” he gave the cup back to Louis. He just looked concerned.

“You’ll be alright?” He asked without any teasing or anything. 

“Of course. I can take care of myself, don’t worry.” Harry replied smiling softly and pouring one shot for Louis. “Sorry for taking your shot”

“It’s fine. Thanks,” he scrunched his face after taking the shot and shook his head, “what are you going to do about Boo?” he asked with a grin. Harry let out a chuckle.

“Take her to my dorm, I don't live far away, wouldn't want someone to take advantage of her.” he shrugged, “I suppose you don’t drink often?” 

“Uh, yeah, no, I don't. I prefer pot cuz drinking always makes me sick and..” he leaned closer to whisper in Harry’s ear, “I’m bit of a lightweight” Harry ignored the shiver that went through his spine when he felt Louis’ hot breath on his ear and just started laughing, Louis was quick to put a finger over his mouth which made Harry gulp and shut up instantly. “Don’t you dare tell that to anyone.” he said in an almost threatening tone. Harry wanted to laugh, so he just bit his lip and looked at the coffee table.

“Another round?” he said, mostly to Niall and Zayn.

“What happened to ‘could i get water please’?” Niall laughed as he poured the alcohol into shots. 

“Oh shut up, i was just being polite.” he scoffed when Zayn laughed, while Niall was pouring the shots he talked with Zayn about how apparently Zayn’s sister came home high one weekend and got grounded for a month. He laughed along with them even though it wasn’t that funny and he didn’t really know how old the girl was. 

“So do you have siblings?” Niall asked Harry and handed him the shot. Oh well, he didn’t really plan on talking about his family tonight, but here we go. He held up a finger, downed the shot and exhaled. Others followed his actions.

“I do, older, she lives in Liverpool, er, i think.” he shrugged, not wanting to talk about it more, he had 4 shots so far, he didn’t feel anything yet, well that’s drinking every other day for three years for you. Nobody was talking and it was bothering him so he just grabbed the bottle and started pouring another round.

“You think?” Louis asked. With his hand on the neck of the bottle and moving it to put in on the table.

“Yeah, I dunno, I used to live with her after high school, but she moved to Liverpool and I haven’t talked to her in a while.” he sat up straighter, “Anyways, let’s play a drinking game!” They cheered and dropped the topic of Harry’s family quickly and he was glad. Niall clapped.

“Let’s play never have i ever!” Niall was so excited it was funny. People in their 20s still play these games? He laughed and nodded.

“Never have I ever sucked someone off!” Ed said and everybody except for him groaned and took a shot.

“Wait Niall you did?” Harry asked after he drank. Confused cuz Niall looks like the definition of a straight guy.

“Yes actually Lou-” he stopped when a beanie hit him in the face.

“Do not say anything.” Louis warned and everybody apart from him and Harry laughed. Harry turned to him, he was ruffling his hair. “Don’t ask, i’m not telling you.” He had quite soft hair now that he wasn’t wearing a beanie, also Harry realized Niall sucking of someone was probably Louis so he just laughed more.

“Never have i ever sucked someone off for money.” Liam said and for a second nobody moved, but then Harry reached out for a shot and Nick followed him. 

“Cheers mate!” Nick laughed and downed the shot. Harry chuckled and drank too. When he put it back on the table, everyone was looking at him, he figured they already knew Nick’s story. He relaxed his body to the couch with a smirk on his lips. He wasn’t planning on sharing things like these tonight, but the alcohol made him braver. Plus it’s not like they are going to judge him for it.

“Grocery store guy, didn’t have enough to pay so i found other ways” he winked and laughed, all of them laughed except for Louis, but he guessed it was because he might be disgusted or uncomfortable. It was pretty disgusting, sucking some stranger just so he could get drunk. But at the time, he didn’t think about it this much and thought he was doing the guy favour as well as himself. 

“Never have i ever slept with two people at the same time” Zayn said, which surprised Harry a bit because he and Liam looked like the couple who would experiment but eh, to each their own. Louis, Harry and Niall took a shot.

“You know, for planning on not drinking tonight you drank more shots than any of us” Louis pointed out with a crooked smile.

“Well who would’ve guessed you guys would be so pure, don’t worry though I have high tolerance,” Harry grinned and winked at Louis. “Also, never have i ever caught someone having sex” he said, because that was the only thing that came to his mind that he hasn’t done. Ed and Louis took a shot, what a pleasant surprise. Liam and Zayn laughed so he supposed they both caught them having sex.

“Never have i ever cried during sex” Louis said with a smirk, looking at Harry. As expected Harry was the only one who took a shot.

“It was all consensual” he winked and chuckled, they stared at him for a moment before laughing and Louis snickered. “What’s up with the questions? I literally drank every single time except for when I asked. Do some fun ones so i don’t have to drink” he smiled from ear to ear and made sure his dimples were showing.

“Sure, oh! Never have i ever had sex with an ex somewhere, where the person i wanted to make jealous could walk in, and they did,” Louis said and made expectant eyes at Liam. Liam blushed while looking at Zayn and took the shot.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Harry murmured. Louis turned to him in an instant with wide eyes. “Stop looking at me like that, of course I did it. Jealous sex is the best sex” He laughed and drank the shot, sheesh he should stop drinking. He still isn’t drunk, he’s on his way to tipsy now, but he should drink some water. Niall was laughing his head off, Nick and Ed nodded and laughed for a bit. Liam was explaining something to Zayn and Zayn had a smirk on his face. Louis was sitting beside him still wide-eyes, but now he also had an amused smile on lips. “I should drink something non-alcoholic, play without me, I'm too far ahead of you anyway.” He said and put his hand on Louis' knee to get up. 

“Could you bring some juice or something, we can’t be drinking just vodka” Nick requested and Harry nodded, he walked beside the armchair where Brooke was still sleeping and he chuckled to himself. 

“We could continue the game” Louis spoke behind him as Harry stepped on the first stair.

“How?” Harry turned to him and stopped. “We don’t have shots and it’s just the two of us” he was confused.

“Well then we could just ask each other ‘yes or no’ questions, maybe?” Louis shrugged and Harry smirked, because obviously Louis wanted to get to know Harry and he made up some stupid game. 

“Have you ever spanked someone in bed?” Harry asked and turned around to go up before Louis could make eye contact.

“Er, yes, a couple of times actually, have you?” 

“Nope, i'm the one getting spanked.” he chuckled and made his way to the kitchen. If they keep talking about that stuff Harry might need to call Xander after. He really shouldn't drink more, fuck.

“Makes sense, how ‘bout the tattoos?” Louis came up behind him and touched his forearms, shit, he had very gentle but firm fingers. 

“Yes or no questions, did you forget already? But yes i like my tattoos, do you like them?” Changing subject, very smooth, Styles. He also ‘freed’ himself from Louis’ touch and went to search for juice. 

“Lower cabinets. I like your tattoos very much, especially the butterfly.” Fuck, his voice even through the loud music, was just sex to Harry's ears. He was invading Harry’s personal space, but honestly, Harry didn’t mind it, he just felt a little flustered.

“It's a moth.” His breath hitched when he bent down to open the cabinets and Louis touched his hips. Shit, his fingers felt so good, shit, shit. Not even Xander makes him feel like this just from a touch, a touch through clothes. For fuck’s sake, what is he? A teenager? Also Xander was his friend, the ex he was still friends with, well, friends with benefits if you will. It was the alcohol, he decided, it must be. 

An idea sparked in his head, he felt like a fucking Albert Einstein when he pushed his hips back while standing up. Louis froze for a second when Harry brushed his ass on Louis’ crotch. The shorter man’s fingers were holding him tighter than before and to say Harry himself wasn’t feeling a bit lightheaded would be a lie. “You’re gonna bruise me.” He said, but didn’t move away, instead he turned his head to look back at Louis. Oh no, his eyes were glassy which meant he was properly drunk. Of course he was, he said he was a lightweight. Was it too late to regret feeling like a genius?

“I bet you like it like that.” Louis said in a deeper voice, maybe, Harry couldn’t really tell. 

“Like what?” Harry asked innocently even though he knew what Louis meant. To ease the tension a bit he put his hands on Louis’ to get them off so he could turn around. Louis’ fingers didn’t move an inch.

“Rough,” he leaned closer to the back of Harry’s neck, “hard,” his front was suffocatingly close to Harry’s back, “bruising,” he whispered to Harry’s ear and to prove his point he squeezed his hips. Fuck, Xander it is. 

“Louis, I can't,” he sighed, leaning his head backwards to close his eyes. “I’m sorry. Just i’m - uh, i am not the one night stand type of guy” he felt the grip on his hips lighten so he turned around and leaned on the countertop. He needed to say it before they both got hard in the middle of a kitchen.

Louis cleared his throat, “yeah, ’s fine, don’t apologise. We should get back down anyways” He didn’t even look him in the eyes. Great, just great. He was supposed to socialize tonight and look how it turned out, awkward. He wanted to make more friends, but the only guy he’s been talking to the whole night was incredibly attractive and also looked like he wanted Harry to be his one night stand which meant they can’t really be friends now. Friends, right, friends, Brooke flashed through his mind and at least he had an excuse to leave early. So he nodded even though Louis couldn’t see it cuz he wasn’t looking at him, and picked up the two bottles of orange juice from the counter top.

Harry grabbed his phone and opened WhatsApp to text Xander.

To XXXander: _can i come sleep at urs tonight?_

He sent it, pocketed his phone and went after Louis who already disappeared into the mass of people. Skipping down the stairs wasn’t a good idea as he almost fell head first, he managed to grab the railing last second. Thank fuck. He saw Louis already sitting down so he sat next to him.

“I found orange guys, hope that’s okay” He grinned and put it on the coffee table. Nick cheered and opened the bottle to drink from it, taking big gulps. Probably a dry throat from smoking pot. “Did you continue the game?” He asked and poured himself another, last, shot. 

“Nah, wasn’t as exciting without you here. We know too much about each other.” Zayn shrugged and others nodded, they were all so drunk or high or whatever. Slow eyes and uncoordinated, funny, he never was the one to be the least drunk at parties. His phone pinged.

“I’m flattered” He laughed while looking at his phone.

From XXXander: _u can come ;)_  
From XXXander: _haha get it?_  
To XXXander: _yeah that was my intention, when?_  
From XXXander: _50 minutes sounds good?_  
To XXXander: _sure i ll be there_  
To XXXander: _do u have lube?_

“Hey,” Louis patted him on the shoulder. Harry looked up at him and was still biting his lips from trying to hide the smile. “you drinking?” Louis looked thoughtful, it was weird.

“Yes, but you shouldn’t. You said it makes you sick.” he accepted the shot from Louis’ hand and muttered a quick thank you. His phone pinged again so he looked down.

From XXXander: _strawberry ;)_  
From XXXander: _dont have condoms tho_  
From XXXander: _bring some or prepare for my raw cock_

Jesus, Harry’s cheeks flushed when he realized Louis could read them too. He quickly locked the phone and drank the shot. “Sorry, uh, I- um” he just put the shot on the table and looked at Brooke. “I should go, you know, to- uh, to get her to my dorm before i get too drunk.” He motioned to Brooke.

“Raw cock huh?” Louis was looking at Harry, maybe amused, maybe disappointed, maybe he was just looking. “Is he your friendly ex by any chance?” 

“Yeah he is. I always use condoms though, so no, no raw cock tonight.” He sighed and pulled his sleeves to his wrists. 

“Raw cock? What the hell are you two talking about?” Niall chirped in, now Harry was blushing not just on his cheeks but probably on the back of his neck too. He needed to leave.

“Harold here,” Louis put both of his hands on his shoulders with force, like he wanted to ground him or something. “just got a text saying he should bring condoms or someone would fuck him raw.” he was grimacing by the last word and Harry just shook his head and stood up. Niall whistled and Nick gave him a wink

“It’s no big deal, really. I’m gonna go, should probably get Brooke back and all that” he went the armchair and picked her up. “It was lovely to meet all of you, eh, good night.”

“Hey, you’re going to come again aren’t you?” Zayn asked as he moved Liam from his lap.

“Yeah sure, some day” He grinned and turned around, as he made his way out and fresh air hit him, he realized just how much he drank. It was nice, pleasant. He knew it shouldn’t become his habit again. He also didn’t feel as miserable as back then, he didn’t need to drink anymore, it was fine. 

He was walking down the street when the alcohol really bubbled in his mind, he was sure he would drop Brooke so he sat down on some stairs and tried to get her on his back so there was less chance of her ending up on the ground.

It took him 15 or more minutes to get to his dorm building, he had time to think this through. Harry opened the main doors and went straight for the stairs cuz he lived only on the second floor and elevators were fucking scary at night. When he got to his dorm he opened the doors and put Brooke on his bed. Grabbed the heels from her feet and unzipped her mini skirt, he should probably feel bad, but really he was doing the girl a favour. After he took off her thighs, tank top and a sheer shirt, he went to find some clean sweatpants and an old t-shirt. He also opened the window and went to grab a cup of water from the main kitchen and put it on the bedside table with Advil. Dressing here was a bit challenging as she kept turning but nothing impossible, after, he opened the bathroom door and grabbed a piece of paper and a marker:

_Hi, I’m Harry!_  
_The clothes you’re in are mine, don’t_  
_freak out! - I’m gay ;) Take the Advil_  
_and drink the water! Bathroom door_  
_should be open - feel free to take a shower._  
_I’ll be back before 10am, will bring coffee_  
_and some breakfast. Laptop’s unlocked_  
_there’s netflix. Hope you feel better_  
_xx H_

He checked his time on his phone, he had about ten minutes. That will work, Xander lived just two streets down from his dorm building. After unlocking the laptop he grabbed condoms from his desk drawer and locked the door. 

To XXXander: _be there in 10!_

Walking for the 10 minutes he came to a conclusion he won’t go to more parties, it wasn’t necessarily bad, just boring a bit. He could hangout with the guys somewhere but not at a party. It just wasn’t for him anymore. Oh! Harry forgot to mention Xander was 24 and out of uni, they met when Harry moved here at the start of the summer. They dated for a month and enjoyed everything but the chemistry wore off so now they just fuck. The occasional ‘love you’ is just in a friendly way. Like, I appreciate you and thank you for being here type of way, not the i would die for you way. 

He rang Xander, “Hello! I’m here, come down please.”

“ _Sure babe, coming_ ” he could hear the smirk in his voice so he just giggled. Not long after the door opened and he was pulled in for a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! should i try to write the Harry/Xander smut or not? thank you for reading :)

**Author's Note:**

> So what do you think? leave your opinions please :)


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